"Mom, how does the Tooth Fairy fly through the air?"
"How do YOU think?"
"I think moms do it."
"But how can a Mom be a Tooth Fairy?"
"Good moms are lots of things, Princess."

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Some Amazing People Live in My House

Yesterday I recounted the Police Officer Incident and its fallout to the girls' play therapist, Dr. S. I sat with Princess while Dr. S. discussed the incident with her, and Princess.... hang on, I have to catch my breath again... Princess TALKED about feeling frightened. She TALKED about the times in her "J- Life" that she had experienced police. She did NOT refute that she was afraid the police could take her somewhere else. Then she pushed herself away from me, made herself the closest person to the door, and wiggled around on the floor. Dr. S. told her we would be working on a big word- "anxiety," and that Princess would be learning ways to not have a fit when she felt like she was feeling at that moment. We did a relaxation exercise involving tightening muscles and noticing how they feel when they relax. Princess turned into a hot 50-lb lump of melted goo. She didn't even move to take chocolate. I am certain she has never felt anywhere near that relaxed in her entire life. I'm continuing the exercise with her at bedtime, hoping she gets "addicted" to the feeling of letting go. This is such a huge and exciting step for her!

Two weeks before, I told Dr. S. that Peanut seemed to be struggling to control herself- as in I think she knows when she is in the deep end, she knows she is getting deeper, but she cannot make herself get out. Dr. S and Peanut worked on Worry Worms. Peanut had to find gummy worms, list a worry, rate her anger, and eat the gummy worm. Peanut listed her triggers (she came up with these HERSELF!) as: 1. When somebody scares me. 2. When Princess spanks me or sneaks up to grab my foot. 3. When Buddy pulls my hair. 4. When Princess, Cuddle Bear, and Buddy be's mean to me. 5. When Mrs. B (her teacher) isn't there. Then, she rated each one somewhere between "blind rage" and "homicidal axe-wielding arsonistic maniac." I was stunned. If it were me who had to list and rate, that is EXACTLY what I would have said. That is one self-actualized little girl, let me tell you.

The next day, we knew Peanut would be having a sub. This is a m.a.j.o.r trigger for her. I believe there are a very precious few people Peanut believes will actually take care of her and protect her, and a sub is definetly NOT one of them, in her opinion. We did our usual pre-sub strategy planning: what choices will you make (respectful and calm), who will you ask for if you can't (Mrs. M and the sensory room), what will you do if she can't come get you (ask for a quiet place). Peanut HERSELF added, "hey! I can make a Worry Worm chart! And then I can find out how angry I am!

Way to go, girls. Way to heal. I am so blessed

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