"Mom, how does the Tooth Fairy fly through the air?"
"How do YOU think?"
"I think moms do it."
"But how can a Mom be a Tooth Fairy?"
"Good moms are lots of things, Princess."

Thursday, January 28, 2010

I Kick the Box, Like a Fox

Fresh off my morning coffee and blog reading, and totally inspired by Christine, I entered the kitchen. Princess was home (again) sick and was coloring on large empty boxes at the table with the Cuddle Bear. I hear Princess suggest (read: you'd better do it) the Cuddle Bear do something, I heard the Cuddle Bear demure, and I saw a Princess hand armed with crayon shoot out onto the Cuddle Bear's box. Sudden shrieking filled the air: "YOU DREW ON MY BOX! THAT'S NOT NICE! YOU DREW ON MY BOX! AAAAAAAAAAAAYAAAAAAH!" Immediately Princess shoots out, "I didn't DO it!"

Braa bra bra baaaaa! This is a job for.... TheraMommy!

I swoop in and share her chair with her. Put my arms around her. She reciprocates by moaning, "noooooo. no. stoooooop. noooooo."
"It's hard to admit you drew on her box, isn't it. But I love being your mom, and I'm right here."

I won't force anyone to review the whole conversation, but just imagine that sequence being repeated about 20 times and include some crayon-throwing, curtain-waving, mommy-pinching, and sister-kicking. Due to the sister-kicking, we moved to the stairway. It's a smaller space, so Princess has to work harder to flail.

I began to sing a soft, beautifully-crafted inspirational song about how it's hard to admit you did something wrong. It's hard because what if everyone thinks all of you is bad because you did something wrong? What if YOU think you're all bad because you did something wrong? But Mommy's right here and Mommy knows Princess is not bad. Mommy will be right here until Princess is strong enough to say, "I wrote on the box."

This was such a gorgeous song, in fact, that it lured Josh into the hallway, where he sang backup until he couldn't take it anymore and broke out into a gospel-style rendition of "I Wrote on the Box, and Everyone Knows it But Me." At this point, the Cuddle Bear wandered in (with the box in question) to see the show. Princess does not appreciate an un-annoyed audience, so she began kicking at the Cuddle Bear and the box, at which point Josh switched to a rap. I held on pretty well until the verse that included, "I kick the box/ Just like a fox./ Like a fox I kick the box/ so I can't saaaaaaaaaaaay/ I wrote/ on/ the/ box." I couldn't take it anymore, and my laugh came out my nose, snorting all over Princess.

By now, Princess had apparently decided that everyone was having too much fun and she was having none, so she said, "I wrote on the box." I jumped up and down and congratulated her for being SO strong, because admitting you're wrong is SO hard, and I loved her SO much, hug, hug, hug, kiss, kiss, hug, snuggle, which of course she accepted warmly.

Or not.


  1. Dude. CRACK. ME. UP.

    Take the family to American Idol..

  2. The visual I have of you and Josh, singing in the hallway to an angry child while another looks on as if all parents sing and rap when someone has lied to them! I'm ready for a reality show! Really, set up some cameras, at least for you tube!

  3. If only I could plan ahead, Natalie. If only I could plan ahead.