"Mom, how does the Tooth Fairy fly through the air?"
"How do YOU think?"
"I think moms do it."
"Ah."
"But how can a Mom be a Tooth Fairy?"
"Good moms are lots of things, Princess."
"OH."

Friday, September 2, 2011

Addictions

Today I got the accusation every mom dreads:

"You don't go outside with me because you're always typing on the computer to your little friends. Nyah!"

This summer I've restricted Princess's play with others to within my hearing. She gets irritated so easily (like because someone's breathing too close to her), and when she's irritated, it's zero to sixty in under two seconds. She can earn 15 minutes of unsupervised play time each time she uses her Calm-Down Card, but it's kind of hit or miss whether she has enough control to stop and do it. This restriction doesn't bother her too much with her sisters, but the neighbor's grand-daughters spend every other weekend at her house, and Princess watches for them to be outside like a death vigil. Then she follows me around chatting and complementing me for awhile before she gets down to the nitty-gritty:

"Did I earn any time yesterday?"

This question is only asked when she knows she did not.
The day before yesterday was hideous, requiring quite a bit of restraint and copious amount of spit dripping down my legs and face.
Yesterday, she played in a pool and ate popsicles.
So she figured she had "had a better day," and therefore, "earned time."

When she found out that she was, indeed, mistaken, she figured the next best thing was to inform me that I had to sit outside and supervise her.

When she found out that she was, again, indeed, mistaken, Princess yelled choice insults at me for several minutes. They included:

"YOU WON'T EVER SIT OUTSIDE AND WATCH ME BECAUSE YOU'RE ALWAYS TYPING ON THE COMPUTER TO YOUR (insert head waggle and finger quote-marks, which impressed me because I didn't know she knew how to use those) LITTLE FRIENDS!"

I was a little taken aback by this. Am I on the computer too much? I use F@cebook and read a couple blogs and check e-mail a few times. I'm part of a support group, and if the day is particularly bad I read what people are saying. So maybe I do? Is my parenting suffering? Are my children neglected? I started to worry. But then Princess continued:

"AND YOU'RE ALWAYS DOING LAUNDRY AND TAKING SHOWERS!!!!!"

Thank goodness! That cleared it all up for me. If my computer time pales in comparison to the time I spend on laundry and hygiene, I figure my F@cebooking future is safe for the time being.

7 comments:

  1. LOL- how nice of princess to put your worrie to rest!

    ReplyDelete
  2. lol... you have to laugh. If your computer times rates right up under your showering and laundry, then you are doing a LOT better than me. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I heard something very similar this week. I had dared to take the time to use the restroom. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, honey, that's too funny. Laundry? Shower? AS IF! Clearly, you should be spending far more time in chatrooms or surfing Y@utube. Isn't that what we all do between picking up toy number 52576 and cooking meal number 12456?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sounds like Princess should start doing her own laundry? Haha!

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Penelope- If only! If Princess were in charge of her laundry, she would run out of clothes and have to walk around naked. Sadly, I know from experience! :)

    ReplyDelete