"Mom, how does the Tooth Fairy fly through the air?"
"How do YOU think?"
"I think moms do it."
"But how can a Mom be a Tooth Fairy?"
"Good moms are lots of things, Princess."

Tuesday, September 20, 2011


Homework continues to be the o joy that it was last year. So far, there is only one difference, and that is that Princess did not give us a honeymoon during the review month of September.

Yesterday she had a math sheet that involved a calculator, and she had clearly been taught how to operate it in class. She did some of her general toying around (9+4+4+7+4+4+7+9 instead of 9447+4479, for instance), and then settled into doing it correctly. For about four seconds. Then came: "find the difference between the two numbers." When she asked me to check her work, here is what I saw crammed into the answer space (_____):

the first numer has a nine in the front and the seced numer has a nine at the end

So. Of course, like a good mom, I tried to explain that the problem was looking for a math answer, not an explanation, but it went over in the usual way. So I stopped and went back to my knitting. Because this was taking place in the Suburban, mind you. During Peanut's soccer practice. In the rain.

Pretty soon I hear: clickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclick
I hold out my hand.

Hand me my calculator please.
Why? I was just pressing this one (=).
Yes. I noticed. But the thing is, I need my calculator not broken. So I can balance the checkbook and make Daddy happy. So since you're not using it for your homework, kindly fork it over.
But whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
Oh come on! We both know you're pressing the equal sign 5000x per second because you know I'll take the calculator and then you can yell at me for making you unable to finish your math sheet.


(more silence)

Can I play on the playground?
Because your homework is not done.
Bwaaaa haha hahahahahaha hahaHAAAAAA! See?

I will say, Princess's speech and language processing therapy is obviously paying off. Because she is coming up with much better mean names to call me much more quickly.


  1. May I suggest this article?

    Way down under #2, Learning Issues - the first bullet point. (Lots of other good stuff here, too - read the whole thing.)

    Best possible advice I can give... let school handle school. Work on relationship at home. Set a time (limited!!!) and place for homework - if she chooses to do it, fine. If she asks for help and is able to receive help, great! If she puts her head on the table and sleeps - well, let school deal with undone assignments (and consider asking the school to reduce the amount of homework given, as it's MUCH more important for you to work on relationship at home, than homework).

    BTW... when she's dysregulated and can't do her homework - don't try logic with her as she's not capable of it. Reassure her she's safe, you love her, and that you understand math and other things can be scary...

    just my $0.02


  2. Well, great! Vocabulary is important too!