"Mom, how does the Tooth Fairy fly through the air?"
"How do YOU think?"
"I think moms do it."
"But how can a Mom be a Tooth Fairy?"
"Good moms are lots of things, Princess."

Monday, February 21, 2011


A few weeks ago there was an episode involving a bodily fluid, the basement sofa, and said items left to be blamed on Jorge. And they would have been, if I hadn't noticed a particular sequence of events that incriminated the culprit. As a result, the offending child has been banned from the basement without parental supervision. The basement that contains the Wii.

Almost daily, she asks if she can play the Wii. Almost daily I say, I haven't seen your plan yet, honey.

I told her basement privileges would be reinstated when she could develop and implement a plan for how to keep the sofa bodily-fluid-free.

This request turned out to be an excellent way to showcase her creativity. Because over the past two weeks she has come up with some fascinating ideas. Most of them involving me doing the work. None of them sounding anything like: use the to.ilet on a regular basis.

She knows the solution. I don't think it's possible to so studiously avoid the correct solution if you don't know what it is. She even came close: she suggested I tell her to use the to.ilet every two hours. Sadly, this does not work, because if she doesn't want to she will do everything involved in using the to.ilet except depositing something in it. So I said, I don't think so, because I've already done all the work involved in training myself to use the to.ilet, and now it is your turn.

However. When I asked, "how do you think Someone Else would solve this problem." she said:

They would use the to.ilet every two hours.

I waited. And waited. And waited. Nothing. No connection. Nada.
Ok. I think we're done here.

A good 98.6% of my frustration parenting this sweet girl is that she won't take help. Ever. I want to help her stop shooting herself in the foot, but she won't give me the gun. So what can I do? Not a whole heck of a lot.


  1. So, do you think she wants you to come up with her solution so if she messes up she can blame someone else? It wouldn't be her fault? Then she could rail against you instead of feeling it herself. Like if she felt her own pain she would get crushed under the weight of it.
    I don't know, just speculating from what you wrote.

  2. @Essie- I was thinking maybe she doesn't believe she can do things that "other people" can do. But the blame probably is a big component- she very much likes things to not be her fault; I think it's too much to bear when they are.

  3. man she ans Fudge could start a club, he is the same way. He sat on the stairs for over an hour today and then finally said to me, are you waiting for an apology? Uh yeah kiddo that would be what you need to do to get off the stairs... I find if I just wait him out and tell him that I know he is bright enough to figure it out he usually does but he is stubborn and would prefer that I just provide the solutions. Good Luck.

  4. The stubborness and the creative way they use the stubborness never fails to amaze me.

  5. Why don't you just put her in diapers? Also, to avoid her assaulting her siblings in the car, why don't you put her in the back seat, keep the middle seats empty and put the others in the seats closest to the front. Or why don't you keep her in the passenger seat?